In Peace

I am never sure how to start posts. Some come more easily then others. This one is going to be especially hard... This morning on my way to work my mom called me to let me know my Grandmother passed away this morning. I can't say it was a surpise, she warned me this weekend that the nurses at my grandmothers nursing home told the family to start making preperations but I didn't think it would happen that quickly. My grandmother, is my dad's mother. She is an amazing mother of 10 children. Only lord knows how she pulled that off. I can't imagine trying to manage more then one child let alone 10! Unfortunately most of my life I have not had the pleasure of really getting to know her. When I was around 10 years old my grandma developed dementia and was never really sure of who my dad was let alone who I was. It was really sad to see but we would sit with her and make her smile. I have to admit, that even through these last few years she scared me a little, not knowing who I was. I wasn't sure how to interact with her. Of course I never stopped loving her, she is family. I think what has always touched me the most is to see how my dad and his brothers and sisters cared for her so much. The hardest part about this is not going to be loosing my grandma, because I beleive she is much happier now but seeing my dad is what is going to break my heart. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. So I am sitting at work taking one deep breath at a time trying to hold it together. Rest in peace Grandma Adele. I love you!!

Supporting the Cause

Warning: Political Garb. Read at your own risk.

The post election frenzy is here. The most influential result on my life so far other then Barak Obama becoming president elect has been Proposition 8. The sadness I felt when I saw that it passed out weighed any excitement I felt for Obama winning his election. I am not sure what the next steps are to fight the winning vote. I know a lot of movements are underfoot. Rallies and protests are popping up all over the country. Recently last Thursday one was held in my city. I didn't go because I had prior obligations but I heard it was just amazing from the friends that did get a chance to go. For the time that my friend was there he said the protest was peaceful and very meaningful. It is great to see the support for diversity here in a state so often overlooked and generalized by the historical majority. I believe in the freedom of speech and that everyone is entitled to their own opinions but more importantly I believe in basic human rights. Last Thursdays rally was a perfect example of US citizens using the gifts and privileges this country has given us. It also was a great tool in helping us continue to developing our rights. It still blows my mind every time something like this comes up that it has taken our country so long to be accepting of everyone in it. Freedom and equality for all? The foundation our country was built on still seems to be a work in progress, but I think it is an excellent goal to work towards. I think we need more peaceful protests and support for people trying to make a difference.

It does sadden me though when people with good intentions grasp at straws to try and get something accomplished. Instead of infiltrating and educating my state people want to boycott it and economically hurt those involved with campaigning for Prop 8. While the tactic makes sense from a general view it over looks all the good things that are currently in the works to try and expand people's minds. In fact it hurts them. Don't boycott Utah. Educate Utah.

Thanks for reading my half educated ramblings. :-)

http://www.indiewire.com/ots/2008/11/park_city_09_in.html

Not taking it personally

How does a person who wears their heart on their sleeve not take things personally?

I know part of growing up is learning to deal with confrontational situations and move on but how do you know when its ok to let go and when it is time to press the issue. I know this is an on going lesson that will follow me through out my whole life but can I just say that I personally don't like it. Who does? I guess.

Work has been a transition the last couple months. My boss who hired me left and I have started working with my new boss who is great so far... It is just turning out to be a bigger transition then I thought it would. Not because of anyone person in paticular but because of a whole bunch of little things here and there. Responsibilities have shifted and the strong relationship I use to have with my old boss, the confidence she gave me, is gone. I feel kind of like I am starting from scratch but with the disadvantage of knowing what I use to do and adapting to the difference. I guess the knoweledge of jobs I have tackled in the past is an asset but when the same job comes up again and it is taken away from me I get a little sad and wonder why I am not the one doing it anymore. I know I should ask why the task isn't mine, or maybe enjoy the fact that people are trying to help and use my time for other productive things but it still makes me grumble a little. grumble grumble.

I also realized in this transition that I am not so good at being an authoritative figure. I crumble and speaking in confrontational issues is a major weakness of mine. I try to think of the best way to say something and my mind just stops... I take a breath and try and think through it and I still end up either confusing people or making it worse. GO ME! Lucky for me I have great support from a few friends at work and some very understanding co-workers. They have been helpful but I still feel sort of like I don't have an answer or am still sorting out how to best fix the confrontations that arrise.

Actually I would simply be happy with being able to deliver a clear conversation during confrontation not even necessarily a way to fix it immediately.

I don't know if any of that makes sense. I am sorry if it doesn't but I have always found I feel better about things when I write about it. So that was me writing about it. Yay for the end of the work day!!

Cheers!

The place I work..

I have to enlighten you all about the place I work. I don't mean Sundance per say but more the physical location, Silver Star. Nestled up on the slopes in Park City, above the city golf course and down the block from Park City Mountain Resort there is a new development of Condos and office buildings called Silver Star. It is a beautiful place with a rustic feel. Getting to know the owners (my landlords, maintenence men, etc) has been a treat. They are two great guys who have all the best intentions but just haven't figured out how to juggle the construction still going underway, building new condos, a snack shop, ski shop, the bar and maintain the buildings they already have up and running. I have to admit my office is very demanding. I feel bad for how many times I have to call them to figure something out.

Today was one of the best. One of my co-workers came over to the main building in a huff wondering why one of the doors to the white building she works out of had been boarded up. Usually I give my staff notice when things are going to be happening to the building so this caught her and myself off guard. I said I didn't know the door was being boarded up and that I will come over right away. When I got to the building, sure enough there was a giant peice of ply wood nailed over the door. I had to investigate. Somtimes when it comes to building management and the things Silver Star does make me feel like a detective. I often have to trouble shoot what is going on and why. So I called one of the owners to see if he knew what happened to my door. His first response was that maybe they blocked out the door so no one got hurt when they were cutting down the tree outside but that he would check and get back to me. Then I was visited by the site forman, Jack. A sweet old man who wears a cowboy shaped hard hat around the parking lot. He came in to see what the problem was. After the details I gave him he went over to look at the building and find out what was going on. 5 min later he was back asking if we got any names on who boarded up the building. We didn't have that information so he then informed us what he thought. The door had a 1" gap in it between the door and the door jam so it didn't seal all the way when closed. He said the contractor who made the door came to pick it up to repair it and would bring it back today or tomorrow. So there is the answer. The kicker is when the building owner called me back he said that the contractor took the wrong door, he was suppose to take another one of our doors on an entirely different building. Apparently the instructions "the north door on the Sundance building" were not clear even though we have our name in big red letters above our building door. Classic. This may not seem that funny to you but after working in this environment for a year, and the things that I have experienced just add to the comedy. :-)

Cheers!

Summer is over and I bummed :-(

It is official. The air is cooling down and I am sad. It may not have hit the valley yet but up here in Park City the leaves are changing and the crispness is in the air. Mornings are darker and the evenings are slowly disappearing into the darkness. The tree out side my work window is a orange rust color and the mountains are sprinkled with oranges, yellows and reds. Fall use to be my favorite time of the year but after last years winter, the million feet of snow that we were lucky enough to get, I can't help but dread another winter. Winter was fun when I was five and was able to roll down the plow made mountains of snow in my front yard, it was even fun in high school when I went tubbing with friends on friday nights up on the golf course slopes but now that I don't benefit from school closing on snow days and have to forge up the canyon in my sturdy subie with the roads covered in slippery slush and ice I am not a big fan of winter. I know winter is part of living here and the first snow fall is always exciting but it seems to last forever while summer skips by far to quickly.

Enough grumbling....

I have to share with you guys a completely mind blowing story. Two weeks ago my boy friend was turning right into an apartment complex just off 1300 east near 2100 south, which is a very busy road, when the person behind him didn't slow down or stop and compltely ripped off the bumper of his fairly new 2008 toyota camry AND JUST KEPT DRIVING! No one stopped to see if he was ok, the two pedestrians that saw the accident happen just kept walking, no one stopped. It totally blows my mind. If you ever drive on this street and sit in the line of traffic that builds try and imagine a car in a drive way just off the road damaged and no one stopping! It's crazy.

Two weeks ago I took a last minute trip to Las Vegas with my boyfriend and a couple of our friends to meet up with some Kiwi's we met while we were in New Zealand in June. It was a spare of the momment trip even though I knew our friends were going that weekend months before I actually decided to it wasn't till 4pm the evening before the my boyfriend and I made the commitment to go (after his car was fixed). That night I packed up and was ready to hit the road early the next morning. I was lucky that my boss didn't mind a last minute time off request. It took us about 6.5 to 7 hours to get there we checked in to our hotel and were ready to play. Our first stop was New York New York to get an Ugly stick at Coyote Ugly. It is a yard of pina colada or whatever flavor you want and it they make them strong. My friends got an extra shot and I think it did them in. Then we went down to O'shea's It's our favorite casino on the strip for gambling and cheap pitchers of beers. It is also my boyfriend's favorite because it is the only casino in vegas that has tables set up to play beer pong. The tables are cheap, it's pretty much the only place that has five dollar black jack tables. You just have to be willing to put up with the loud music and an outdated atmosphere. I have to say I kind of had it with Oshea's that night, the beer pong tables were soo crowded and there is no where to sit and watch while your friends play. The smoke was bad. I'd haev to say that was my biggest complaint while being in vegas, the smoke. I know when you go it's a given that it is going to be smokey but my tolerence for it is not as strong as it use to be. It literally made me sick. Saturday night I had jsut had it, I didn't feel up for anything other then going back and enjoying my room. Luckily my other friends had booked a show so I didn't feel like I was letting them down by not hanging out. I did feel bad that my boyfriend came back with me when he could have been out gambling or playing with his buddies when their show got over but I did tell him repeatedly that he could go and I would be fine. Bless his heart for caring about me. :-)

Anywho... that is all that has been going on lately. Work is getting busy. Our staff size is already multiplying on a weekly basis and it kills my brain to think the festival is just around the corner. It should be another great year though!

Cheers!

New Apartment

It's been about two weeks since I have moved into my new apartment. The floor plan is great but the place could use a little love. I live in a complex that is actually a bunch of individulally owned condos. I am renting my apartment from the condo owner who I swear hasn't walked inside the place since he purchased it. Obvisouly it isn't that bad other wise I wouldn't be living there but the walls could use a good coat of paint and the appliances (even though they work well) could be updated. Here are a couple of pictures of my new place.

My kitchen with 1970s gold counter tops and appliances. ->

<- View from the living room, looking at the dinning room and kitchen. See the orange and red paint swatches? I am thinking of a bright accent wall. Right now the red is winning.

Living room looking out the patio window->

Saving up for another brown slip cover for the love seat and I am trying to pull the orange, red and gold out of the rug. Not sure what to do about the wood paneling though. :-/

First half of my bedroom, it's a big room and I don't know what to do with it. Right now it is very empty and blah...

Looking out at the window.

So I guess if you have any suggestions I'm open to it. I think in this corner-> I am going to put a chair for reading and lounging.

Here is to new beginnings!